


Thirty

by notjustmom



Series: The Boys in Sussex [31]
Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Established Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, F/M, M/M, Retirement, Sussex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-21
Updated: 2017-11-26
Packaged: 2019-02-05 03:33:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,187
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12786048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notjustmom/pseuds/notjustmom





	1. Chapter 1

"You can't be serious!" Alicia shook her head as she watched the panels of the giant bookcase in Mycroft's library slide apart.

"Well, it's a cross between an archive and a panic room - it came in handy when -" Mycroft stopped short and whispered, "nothing you need to worry about, a story for another day, perhaps."

Alicia walked into the room, and made swift calculations in her head, as she examined the walls, then dropped onto the edge of the single bed. "I'm assuming there is a tunnel beyond the other door?"

"Of course. On occasion, I did choose the wrong side and had to disappear till the tides turned, and they always did, eventually."

"How much of all of this concerns Sherlock and John?" 

"Directly, about a third, they caused trouble even back then if you can believe it. Indirectly, all of it, it is part of them. Part of us. But, I want to give them the important items; things Sherlock has never seen, for instance - from the time when John was in France - letters he wrote that he never sent, John lived into his eighties, he wrote to Sherlock every day, even if it was just a sentence or two about the weather or a poem - he wasn't a bad poet, just a bit on the romantic side."

"No... really?" Alicia rolled her eyes at him and laughed.

"And this..." Mycroft walked over to a section of wall and pulled out a small trunk. "As I told you, after John returned to France, Sherlock never spoke again. But, he too, wrote to John, every day, but as he had time, he had no visitors, not even - I - was summoned to his cell so I could say goodbye to him - he was seventy-five. I held his hand as he - he always blamed me for John's departure, and he was correct - I've paid for that for centuries, but I saw little point in - I was still learning, there is no guidebook for what I am, what we are - I know now it would have been enough for him, if he could have simply been able to see John, spend time with him, but I overreacted and counseled Henry to reward John for his service by giving him land in France, and a suitable wife - they were well-matched, she was quite exceptional in her own right, but I -" He donned a pair of white gloves, opened the trunk and carefully pulled out a book of beautifully crafted illuminations and laid it out on the table. 

Alicia got up from the bed and stood next to him as he gingerly turned the pages. "Sherlock? He made these?"

Mycroft nodded. "I found these after his passing and was going to send them onto John, but received information that he had died a day before Sherlock. John always... sometimes Sherlock outlived him for quite some time through sheer perverseness, sometimes to piss me off, I believe. Usually though, it was as if, he knew..." 

Alicia placed a gentle hand on his back and together they took a deep breath and let it out. "You want to give them those things that mean something personal to them alone?"

"I want them to know that one never forgot the other, even when they were separated, living apart - because of my interference or other outside forces, or by their own choice."

 

Greg placed a mug of tea in front of John and sat down next to him. 

"You want to know."

"If it's something serious - I'd like to know, if I can help -"

John looked up at his friend and shrugged. "Not sure if you'd believe me - if I told you."

Greg snorted and took a sip of his tea. "I've known Sherlock for a long time now, I've learned not to reject anything out of hand, simply because it's -"

"We've known each other since the 1300s."

Greg nearly choked on his tea, but managed to take a breath. "Come again?"

"Through the last, roughly seven centuries, we keep bumping into each other."

"Yer talking reincarnation, somethin' like that?"

"Something like that."

"And Mycroft?"

John nodded. "The poor bastard has been Sherlock's older brother for the same amount of time."

Greg laid his tea down carefully and whispered, "bloody hell. Explains a lot."

"Does, doesn't it?" John laughed.

"How long have you known?"

"Me? Not that long, Sherlock has known since his time away - but - he thought we only went back to Victoria's reign. I found out a few days ago that it's been since before Richard the Second."

"So, let me get this straight - you and Sherlock, yer like, I dunno, kinda like Doctor Who, you keep regenerating - and finding each other -"

John shrugged. "As good as any other explanation I could give you. But this is the first time, we've ended up 'together' together."

"It's taken you nearly seven centuries? Talk about slow-burn... damn. I mean - damn, John."

"And it nearly didn't happen this time. Mostly my fault -"

Greg shook his head. "No. You both - God. Makes so much sense now - you two spent so much time running from each other, you even tried to get yourselves killed before you two ever met. You went to war when you didn't have to - and he - he tried, he worked so hard to avoid the day when he... he knew you would meet one day. Let me guess. You always marry someone else or you die on him, right? Every single time?"

John stared into his mug and nodded. "Yeah -"

Greg watched his friend for a moment in silence. "So, now, what happens now?"

"Mycroft will be visiting soon, and bringing us 'evidence' of our past lives."

"He's kept all of that stuff all this time? So, not only has he had to suffer being Sherlock's brother, he's like the guardian of your failures to become a couple since the 1300s."

John snorted into his mug, and they both started laughing.

Molly yawned as she walked into the kitchen. "What is so funny? You two could wake the dead..."

That only served to send them into hysterics. She looked at them and rolled her eyes, then poured herself a mug of tea and sat down to wait for them to calm down.

Greg shook his head. "I'll tell you later - it's just bizarre enough to be completely and utterly true. Is Sherlock up yet? I wanted to work on the plans for the house if he's up for it."

"Yeah, he went into the village for a bit, Gertrude needed more food..." John sighed and met Greg's eyes. "He needed a bit of a break, should be back soon."

 

"I don't know if -"

"If you should know everything?" Z asked.

Sherlock nodded and shoved his hands deeper into his pockets.

"You're still seeing things you don't understand?"

Sherlock bit his lip and nodded again.

"Wouldn't it help to have context for what you have running through your head? In your place, I'd want to know. As hard as it will be to see and learn things that you'd rather not - I think it would be worse to always wonder."

"Context." Sherlock sighed and shrugged. "Is it worth it to exhume our past purely for context? I know what happened the last two times, I'm assuming it will be more of the same. Every time, I lose him. Every single time, Z. Either because he dies in war, or he chooses to be with someone else - yes, I know society helped him to make that choice, but he still - he still walked away, each time, Z, and there was nothing I could do to stop him."

"He's here now."

Sherlock shrugged, then muttered, mostly to himself, "yeah, I know."

"Are you afraid he will learn something that will make him leave you?"

"No. Yes. I - honestly, I don't know, Z."

"I have never been in your shoes, and I can only guess at what you have been through because of him, because of whatever makes the two of you the way you are - but I do know one thing. He loves you, full stop. You have time with him now, time that no one can take away, except you. If you want my advice, go home, be with him, love him, and then learn from what Mycroft has to tell you. You have choices this time, Sherlock. Yes, you will probably learn things that will hurt - but you will be with him, you will be together. Because if I know anything, and I happen to know quite a lot, the only way that man will leave you is in a box."

"Z." Sherlock whispered.

"I know, but you know it's true. Don't you?"

"Yes."

"Now - go get Gert her food, and go home and be with him. And bring everyone over for tea tomorrow."

Sherlock got to his feet and cleared his throat. "Thank you, Z. I just needed -"

"Yeah, I know. A bit of perspective, hmm?"

"Yeah. Just needed someone to knock a bit of sense into me."

"We all need that sometimes, kid."

"Even you?"

"Especially me, I'm just a mere mortal, after all."

"I don't believe that for a moment."

Z grinned at him. "Go on with you -"

"See you tomorrow."

 

"How is he, then?" Gladys asked as she came onto the porch as Sherlock drove off.

"Coping best he can - I think he's trying not to implode, he's always a bit afraid that John will leave him. Understandable, of course with their history, but, he's realising he has to trust John to stay this time, and it's not easy for him to trust that, especially now. He just has to believe love is enough, when it hasn't been before."

"Poor boys."

"Poor boys, indeed." He shook his head as she laid a hand on his shoulder. "Tea ready?"

"Of course." She snorted. "When has it not been ready?"

"Come here, you." He pulled her into his lap and she let out a squeal.

"Zachariah Moses."

"Glady, I still -"

"Yes, Z. I still love you too. No matter how ridiculous you are."

"Tea?"

"Tea."


	2. Chapter 2

"Sherlock?" John yawned as he felt Sherlock's shivering form climb into bed next to him.

"I'm sorry - didn't mean to wake you."

"Wasn't asleep." John rolled over and turned on the light, then turned once again and waited for Sherlock to speak.

"I was going to come straight home from the village, like Z told me to, but then I took a wrong turn and I kept driving. I didn't know where I was going - I thought - I didn't think - I have everything, everything I've ever wanted, John. For even longer than I had once believed. I got scared, John. It's stupid, I know that. I do. I got halfway somewhere, I don't even know, and then, I stopped the truck, and got out, I just took a breath and then it started to rain, the sky simply opened up, so I got back in the truck, had to wait for the worst of it to pass - I must have fallen asleep - when I woke up it was getting dark, and all I wanted was to be with you. Z told me I have choices this time. Before - those other times -"

John nodded.

"You - you always chose to leave me. And I know, I know there were reasons, you didn't - really have any options, but, it's - it's as if it's hardwired into me, that you will always leave me in the end."

"When I told Greg today, he said something that I've spent the rest of the day thinking over. He said we'd been spending this lifetime running from each other, I went to war when I didn't have to, and you - you had tried to - you knew we would meet one day, and you were trying to avoid it, avoid the inevitable loss that would come. I found you, I think, precisely because I had done what I always had done. If I hadn't - the odds that I'd end up in the park that day - I guess, we would have found some other way to meet - but - I needed to meet you that day, Sherlock. If I hadn't - if you hadn't seen me - if you hadn't given me a choice, something to run to that next evening. Shit. I tried calling you when the storm started, and realised you had left your mobile on the kitchen table. I had to - I had to believe you were coming back, you once gave me the choice and this time, I had to let you choose to come home. I even made curry - there's still some left if you're hungry - Mum - she didn't try to - she just told us stories about the time she and Em managed to get to the States and they served in the Civil War, not as nurses - point is, there wasn't even a question in her mind that you weren't coming back home."

"I realised something this afternoon, John. Something I had forgotten somehow. I didn't know you from before, the day we met at Bart's - I just saw someone in pain, you intrigued me, no one else had ever been kind to me for no reason, I wanted to know you - I finally understood who you were when I stood on the roof, and could hear you trying to talk me down safely, to get me back to Baker Street, but I had fallen in love with you, long before that moment. You see, John, I had made my choice, even before I knew I had no choice but to love you. I chose you, John." Sherlock reached out and placed a trembling finger on John's warm lips. "I chose you."

John pulled Sherlock into his arms and wasn't surprised to feel hot tears stream down both of their faces; he sighed as Sherlock's lanky limbs wrapped around him, holding him tightly to this place and time. "I never wanted to, Sherlock, it was - you don't - you will never know how hard it was for me to walk away from you. It just about killed me - that day that I got married to Mary - the first time - I kept wanting to search the faces to see if you were there, but I was afraid that if I saw you, I wouldn't have been able to go through with it, and I knew somehow that I had to."

"I was there. Of course I was there, John. I should have stood with you, as your friend. I couldn't do that for you, but I made myself go to the church. I got myself up in a ridiculous disguise, but you would have seen through it had you turned, but you never did. I escaped before you made your vows to her, I couldn't bear to - I never walked into another church after that day. Not in that life. But John, I don't want to think about them right now - I can't. I just want to be with you, right here, now. Please, John? Please -"

John nodded and silently rolled them so he could look down into Sherlock's tear-stained face, the beautiful green eyes were clear now, free of any doubts, but full of need.

"Please, John."

"I'm here, love." John slowly lowered himself over Sherlock, until they both let out a whimpered sigh as their bodies slotted together, as they always had. He reached for Sherlock's hands, threading their fingers together as he moved gently against him, pressing him into the bed, trying to tell him without a word of his love, the love that they had been chasing through time was real, never more real than it was at this moment.

"Johnnnnn...." Sherlock rumbled desperately at his ear. "I need you to - please touch me, I -" John reached between them and wrapped his hand around the hard, wet heat they shared and stroked them until Sherlock found his mouth and kissed him until they both gasped and trembled together. John rested his head over Sherlock's chest, letting out a breath as Sherlock rested his large hands in his hair. "There will be times when I get scared, I know that, but I promise, next time, I will run to you. You are my safe place, John, you are my sanctuary and my home. I'm sorry I ever doubted you, doubted us." They rested in silence for a moment until they both heard Sherlock's stomach growl.

"You didn't eat today, did you."

"Forgot." Sherlock admitted sheepishly.

"Come on, shower, then I'll heat you up some curry, hmmm?"

"I - " Sherlock sat up and met John's smiling eyes.

"Yeah, love. I know. All of it -" He laid his hands into Sherlock's wild curls and pulled him close once more. "I know, love."


	3. Chapter 3

"I have a question, and I understand if you don't want to answer, you may not even have an answer," Alicia said quietly as she placed his tea in front of him then picked up her own and took a sip.

"How did I let Sherlock fake his own death and not tell John the truth?"

She nodded and sat down across from him and waited.

"I honestly believed John was safer if he thought Sherlock was dead. If he were still being watched - and I found out later he was -"

"Mary."

"Mary. He couldn't have faked that grief with her, she would have seen through him; Sherlock had been correct in his assessment. At that point, I still felt I had to act as neutrally as I always had - there had been other ways to deal with Moriarty, but Sherlock wanted - he wanted to end it his own way. But he miscalculated, we both did. And it cost him, it nearly cost him everything - and then I lost him, my own fault - I have always underestimated my brother, just as much as he believes in his own cleverness a bit too much. He always liked things to be clever - but, most of the time, people are quite simple - I think he realized he was close to losing John if he hadn't already, and tried to speed things up a bit - he shook off my people, and he was truly on his own, and of course, he was captured and tortured - took me some time to find him -"

"That's when you were - you were supposedly overseeing some election somewhere - you went yourself."

"Course I did." Mycroft fiddled with his teacup, but his fingers trembled too much to pick it up.

"How long had it been since you were last in the field, not saying you weren't fit, love, but - ?"

"Are you implying I was a bit 'long in the tooth' for 'leg work?' "

"No," she nodded with a smirk.

"Couple of decades, I think you know that." He tried to smile back at her, but found he couldn't. "I should have sent someone else. I thought I was still capable of objectivity even then -" Mycroft picked up his tea then put it down again. "Truth is, sentiment was beginning to creep in - I missed my brother - it was my fault that he had gone, that he was missing - I should have brought him home sooner, if I had told John earlier, perhaps he never would have met Mary... knowing John as I did then, he would have made me take him with me, we could have avoided so much -"

"All of you could have been killed. Or just John - or just Sherlock - or -"

"I spent years telling myself that." Mycroft sighed and picked up his tea again, finally taking a sip.

"They survived, Myc. They're together now and happy, just took them a bit of time."

Mycroft nodded. He watched her over the edge of his cup, knowing she wasn't quite finished yet. 

"Are you - are they certain - I mean, I know they have the right to know, of course they do, but will it hurt them more, especially Sherlock, to have to relive all of those lifetimes when they couldn't be together?"

"I'm tired, Ali. This time - I'm hoping, honestly, once they know - I'll be let off the hook so to speak - I just want to - I just want to be able to focus on you, on us, on whatever time we have. I don't know why we are the way we are - whether we keep getting reborn together until we get it right? I don't know - maybe I'm being taught a lesson? That I've been wrong for centuries - which is, I suppose possible though highly improbable - "

"Wrong about what, love?" Alicia's voice had dropped to a whisper.

Mycroft rolled his eyes and reached out for her hand, bringing it to his lips. "Sentiment. Sherlock has spent the last six centuries trying to be with the person who made him whole, while knowing he would most likely lose him, while I've spent the same time ignoring the very idea that I could even have a heart." He searched her face and wondered how she never blinked at his gaze that made most despots cringe. "Then, again, it could just be I was finally lucky enough to meet my heart."

 

Sherlock opened his eyes to find John studying him. For a brief moment, he thought about making some smart remark, but then realised he wanted John to stay right where he was; his sleep roughened hair was sticking straight up in all directions, he had finally gone to see Davey and had asked for a 'nearly' regulation cut - so he very much resembled a -

"Don't even say it."

"What?" Sherlock tried to put on his most innocent face, knowing John didn't buy it for a minute. "I like it. I had missed your short hair... it reminds me of the first time I saw you..." He rolled his eyes and mumbled as he reached out to ruffle John's hair, "this time."

"Good save." John smiled at him and brushed a curl that had drifted to dangle over his eyebrow. He tucked it behind Sherlock's ear, then kissed his forehead. Sherlock closed his eyes and let his arms drape around John pulling him closer.

"I don't want to move from this bed today - I just want to be here. With you - can we, please, John?"

John answered in his usual manner, without uttering a single word.


	4. Chapter 4

"Myc? Myc. Breathe for me. Take a breath, love."

"Ali?" Mycroft opened his eyes and found her holding him in her arms, stroking his hair. "Wha -"

"Panic attack."

"I don't have panic attacks." He tried to pull away from her, but she shook her head and continued holding on to him.

"I've been trying to bring you back - find you - whatever - wherever, or is it whenever -" Alicia blew a stray from her face and sighed. 

"How long?"

"Fifteen minutes, maybe twenty?"

"Damn." Mycroft rubbed his face and finally relaxed into her arms. He closed his eyes again and muttered, "one of the times I had to use the tunnel... Mary... Elizabeth... it was quite a while before I could return safely, for us - no - don't want to talk about it, just -"

"Tea?" Alicia suggested as she kissed his forehead and looked down into his eyes. "I wish I could help you, Myc."

Mycroft nodded as he reached up to touch her cheek and watched her eyes slowly close as she leaned into his hand. "You are helping, just by being here - I know I couldn't do this - without you. I hope you know that."

 

"So..." Molly began as she and Sherlock were walking Gertrude. He had his arm locked with hers, as they turned onto the road.

"Greg told you." 

"Uhmhmm. Makes sense. You two. From the time he walked into the lab - when -?"

"When did I know?" Sherlock asked quietly.

She nodded, and kept looking at the road ahead of them, watching Gertrude as she stayed close by, not running ahead as she usually did.

"When I was on the roof. Bart's. I could see - I saw him, only it wasn't him - I could see myself reflected in a silver tea pot. I was a child. He was older - I knew then, right as I had to leave him. I don't know for sure, Molly, but I think it was the first time I've ever -" 

She waited for him to continue, but held his arm tighter to let him know she was listening.

"I had never left him. Before. He always - he was the one to leave first - I know, I do - he didn't have many options."

"But six hundred years..."

Sherlock nodded.

"Seems like the universe has been holding a grudge for a long time - "

Sherlock finally stopped walking and turned to face her, and started laughing. "Yeah, seems a bit much, doesn't it?"

"Wonder what a person would have to do in order to -"

"I don't even want to know, Molly." He wiped the tears from his eyes and bit his lip.

She sighed and shook her head at him and took his arm again. "You know this whole thing - it doesn't change how I feel about you guys, yeah? You two were always a bit - I don't know, unusual - this just clears things up a bit."

"What do you mean?"

"How you two - why you two were so, not afraid exactly - snakebit, may be more accurate - especially you, why you couldn't tell him, why you let him marry her - because it was what had happened before - why you - damn it. You nearly died so many times, Sherlock, because -"

"I just wanted him to be happy - if I couldn't be with him, if he never remembered, I just wanted him to have a good life. I wanted to do better this time. Before, the other time he married her, I couldn't stand up for him - because I couldn't deal with him being with someone else, I couldn't even be his friend enough to - I should have known about her, Molly, but she seemed to be exactly what he needed, I had thought that maybe this time, he could have a family -"

"He does, Sherlock." Molly squeezed his arm again. "This time he has you, and Grace and Z and Glady, and us. Because of you, sweetie. You were brave enough - you gave this all to him. And to us. Actually, speaking of family, I have a question, we have a question - will you and John be godparents to Maddie Grace?"

Sherlock stopped in his tracks and took a breath, then nodded and kissed her forehead. "Nothing would make us happier, Molly." He smiled as he heard someone's stomach growl, whether it was hers or his or both, he couldn't tell. "Hmm... I think it's nearly time for tea."

"At Z's?"

"Uhmhmmm..."

Molly grinned up at him. "This life is good, Sherlock. Don't forget that."

Sherlock shook his head as they turned back towards the farm. "Not bloody likely. Oops, sorry, little one - you aren't meant to hear that quite yet."

Molly laughed and moved his hand to her roundness. "I think you're forgiven."

"Oh! Molly - I felt her -" Sherlock's eyes glittered at her.

"Crazy, huh?"

"Not any crazier than anything else -" He met her eyes again. "You are remarkable, Molly Lestrade."

"Yer not so bad yerself, Sherlock Holmes." She muttered as he tightened his hand on her arm and they began walking again, Gertrude dashing ahead as always.

 

"Things are better, then." Z nodded as he watched Sherlock into the seat next to him.

"Yeah. You were correct... as always..." Sherlock rolled his eyes in his direction, but was smiling.

"Well, you get to my age, you tend to learn a few things..."

"I'm not - I -" Sherlock closed his eyes as his voice faded and he began to snore lightly.

"Yeah, I know, kid, I know." Z sat back and watched the last of the leaves swirl down the quiet street in front of him. "You'll be alright, kid, you all will."


	5. Chapter 5

"Funny the things one forgets..." Mycroft muttered as he played with the remains of his dinner, he couldn't recall precisely what he had just eaten, he assumed it had been of good quality... he looked up suddenly and realized Alicia had somehow maneuvered him out of the house and into his favourite restaurant, had probably ordered what he always ordered for himself, and, he picked up his glass and sniffed it, then took a sip - his favourite wine. "Apologies. Inexcuseable."

Alicia grinned at him and shook her head. She knew better than to reach for his hand even in this restaurant - it was still too public, even though their relationship was 'understood.'

"Don't be ridiculous. You'll want your pudding. They have the sticky toffee tonight, people will talk if you don't..."

"Can't have people talk, now, can we?" He leaned in closer and took her hand, raising it to his lips. "Can't have that at all. Just not done."

"Myc!"

"Ali. I'm done hiding. I want you to wear my ring on your finger - I want - I want people to know."

"You funny old thing, you." Alicia bit her lip. "You are all too human, aren't you? After all this time. You do have a bit of an ego, don't you."

Mycroft managed to blush, but he shrugged. "I want anyone who cares to know that I have managed to convince the most remarkable woman that I am worthy of her love..."

She met his eyes and reached out to touch his cheek. "Myc. I am - you have no idea -"

"Lady Smallwood?"

She didn't look away from Mycroft's gaze, or remove her hand from his face, she simply nodded and cleared her throat. "One sticky toffee with two spoons, please?"

"Very good." He nodded and departed without another word.

"People will definitely talk..."

"Let them, love, let them." 

 

"Did you and Howard have a date in mind -" John began as poured out his second cup of tea and carried it to the table.

"We thought next Saturday, if you didn't have plans?" She grinned at him.

"So soon."

Sherlock shook his head. "I'm guessing they've waited even longer than we did, John." He got up from the table and kissed Grace's cheek. "Tell us if you need us to do anything -"

"Just be there?" She looked down into her empty mug and mumbled, "John - I was hoping, I know it's sillly, but will you give me away? I understand if - "

Her words came to a halt as John was helping her out of her chair and into his arms. "Of course, Mum. I'd be honoured." He looked up at Sherlock and found he could no longer speak.

Sherlock cleared his throat and moved to get John another mug of tea, but Grace reached for his hand, keeping him where he stood. "Harry and Clara?"

"They'll be here Friday night - Davey will do the service - Phil will stand up for his father. You will finally have a brother, John - and a father - the father you should have always had -"

"Mum. Don't." John held her tighter for a moment, then kissed her hair and looked into her eyes as she glanced up at him. "I still - I'm arse at this kind of thing - I need to - I think Gert needs a walk."

Grace nodded and took Sherlock's hand, placing it into John's. "The weather's going to turn soon, don't stay out too long." Sherlock whistled for Gertrude as John headed out the kitchen door, pulling Sherlock behind him.

Sherlock turned and met Grace's eyes. 

"I know, Sherlock." She smiled at him and he nodded as he and Gertrude followed after John.

 

"You're not losing her."

"I know."

"She will just be in the village."

"I know that, too."

Sherlock waited.

"They should have had more time, Sherlock."

"Time is... and especially for them - not like it is for other people. They know each other, they've already - it's just their time now. You gave it to them, John."

"No." John shook his head.

"You wrote her back, John, invited her home. You and Harry brought her back home. To Howard, to Em, to Z and Glady, to the village, the place where she belongs, to the people she belongs to. You brought us home, John."


	6. Chapter 6

Any chance you and Alicia could come to farm this Saturday, Grace and Howard are getting married. - S

 

Mycroft yawned and looked at the text, then showed it to Alicia. She nodded, and got up to make tea.

 

Of course, we'll be there. I'll bring a few things if you are ready. - M

 

Sherlock looked down at John, tucked into his side, fast asleep.

 

Yeah, let's do this slowly, hmm? - S

Of course. - M

Are you alright? I hadn't thought what it must be like for you to, I don't know, go back and think about things. I'm sorry, Myc. - S

I didn't realise either, once I started going through our history, I've had to reconsider things I've done. - M

You did the best you could, Myc. I've never thanked you - so, hmm, thank you? - S

Thank you, brother mine. - M

See you soon. - S

 

Mycroft turned off his phone and looked up to see Alicia standing in front of him. 

"You look as if you just won the Lotto."

He shook his head and undid her robe, then pressing his face into her soft skin, sighed heavily. "He basically let me off the hook, Ali, he actually thanked me. All of those times when I - I helped take John away from him - or was the messenger - I honestly never believed he'd -"

"He's different, Myc. You're different. I think you know, love and happiness, can change a person a bit. It matters what we do when we know better. You knew better this time. You knew how to help them and you did it. Honestly, before now, was there ever a time when they could have everything they have now. I know, it would be nice to think they could have found a way, but, you know in your heart, their time is now, all they went through before, all you all went through in this life, you all deserve a little bit of peace, don't you think?" She wrapped her arms around him, and curled around him as she felt him shudder against her. "You're a decent bloke, Mycroft Holmes. A good man, love. You are, whether you believe it or not. I know it."

 

12 October -

Well, in a couple of days, Howard and I will be married, Em. I wonder - I suppose I will always wonder if that is what you intended. When you left me so soon this time - but I couldn't stay then. I had to leave so I could come back. I wish it hadn't taken me so long, but things seem to have a way of working out. John will be giving me away, the girls will be here, Myc and Alicia, Mrs, Hudson and her Mrs. Turner will be here too - they will be here tomorrow, they will stay with Z and Glady to help cook, it was meant to be small - but, I have a family, Em, a strange, but wonderful family. I didn't think I deserved it. But, I'm learning how to accept the love that is given, and I know I can love without it hurting quite so much. I know I have your blessing, I see you in the stars, in the changing of the leaves; I hear you in the hum of the bees, the winds that whisper to me... I know, love. 

 

"Sherlock?" John sat up and saw him standing at the window.

"Hmm?"

"What is it?" John threw off the covers and crossed the room to stand behind him, laying a gentle hand on his back.

"I just - I have the strongest feeling that everything is all right."

"It is."

Sherlock turned to face him. "No, I mean, finally, I don't - I'm not afraid anymore, John. I don't feel like disaster is lurking around every corner any longer. And it should be terrifying. But it isn't. I know no matter what happens, we'll go on. I just know it - and I can't explain it, I'm so sure of you, of us - of the love in this house - the love we have."

John looked into his eyes and saw the truth of his words. "I believe you, love. I do." He reached up and tangled his fingers into Sherlock's curls pulling him gently until their foreheads met. They took a deep breath together and John sighed as he felt Sherlock drop slowly to his knees in front of him.

"Sherlock." John followed him down and cradled him in his arms.

"I am so full and light and - I know, logically I know, rationally I know it's not something I can explain - but I know your love for me is the only thing that has kept me here for so long - I will never understand, and it doesn't matter any more, John." John nodded and they sat in silence as the winds rattled the windows and the rains began again.


End file.
